Spying on someone’s computer is bad. As in “go to jail” bad. However, there are a few very narrow exceptions, like monitoring your kids or employees. If you fall in this category (or just want to know how someone might be monitoring you), here’s how.
This post is part of our Evil Week series at Lifehacker, where we look at the dark side of getting things done. Sometimes evil is justified, and other times, knowing evil means knowing how to beat it. Want more? Check out our evil week tag page.
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First, a big, big disclaimer: monitoring another person’s computer without their permission isn’t just wrong, it can be a federal crime. There are only a few veryspecific conditions in which you’re allowed to monitor a computer someone else uses. For example, an employer may be allowed to monitor certain things, but only on hardware the company owns. A parent can track their child’s activity because they’re legally responsible for their children. However, outside this situations, there isn’t much wiggle room, and there probably shouldn’t be.
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Even in cases where it may be legal, you could still open yourself up to privacy lawsuits if you’re not careful. You might end up recording an employee’s Facebook password through logging software, but if you then used that to access their private messages, that would cross the line.
Finally, tracking someone else without their knowledge (even if it’s legally okay to do so) will almost certainly violate their trust. If you’re a parent with a teenager, monitoring their web activity may be acceptable, but you could alienate them. Legal and ethical justifications don’t fix broken trust. Consider the social costs to tracking as well before you proceed.
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First, Determine What (and Whether) You Want to Track
Finding out what someone else is doing isn’t as simple as saying “Computer! Watch them and report back to me!” You need to actually know what you’re looking for. If you’re a parent, you might want to give your child privacy, while making sure they’re not visiting seedier parts of the internet. If you’re an employer who needs to monitor an employee to watch for wrongdoing, you might want to log everything. Generally, monitoring falls into three categories:
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It’s important to decide very specifically what you want to track, because tracking too much can cause legal problems. If you only need to keep employees off of certain websites, don’t use a keylogger. If you want to keep children away from porn, you probably don’t need to monitor every Facebook message. Keep your tracking minimal to avoid any complications down the road.
Choose the Right Software
Once you’ve decided how and why you want to monitor someone’s computer, you need to get the right software. While there are a ton of monitoring tools out there, we have a few suggestions from reputable organization. Keep in mind, you’re dealing with surveillance software. You may be able to find a free keylogger from a random developer’s website, but you can’t always know if that tool will be secretly phoning home. In this case, it’s best to stick with established companies you know you can trust.
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Monitor a Child’s Activity: Parental Control Tools (Windows/OS X)
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Both Windows and OS X have built-in tools that allow adults to keep tabs on a child’s activity. You can use these to monitor and filter your child’s activity. There are a couple of key differences, but some features are shared between both platforms. Here’s how the features break down:
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To use these features, both platforms require you to set up a child’s account. You can find information on how to create a new child’s account on OS X here or on Windows 10 here. You can also find information at these links on how to manage each platform’s settings.
Keep Track of An Employee’s Productivity: ActivTrak (Windows/OS X)
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If you’re an employer who wants to get a more detailed look at what your employees are doing, ActivTrak is a decent solution. It allows you to monitor several employees computers at once and provides detailed reports on a user’s activity. Here are some of the key features:
As an admin, you can log into a web-based control panel to view activity usage stats within minutes after setting up the computers in your office. You can set custom categories based on what’s productive and unproductive in your office. For example, your social media intern using Facebook may be “productive,” but a case manager might not be. You can also use the Reports tab to see which applications and websites are most common among one or all of your employees.
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The free tier of this service allows you to monitor three users (called “agents”) with one admin and a limited amount of storage. You can pay to add more agents or new features, like the remote installer. The paid tiers begin at $336/year for 5 agents and go as high as $1920/year for 50 agents. Obviously, the higher tiers aren’t something you’re going to want unless you know that your business is going to need it.
Investigate An Employee For Potential Wrongdoing: Spector
If you have a serious suspicion that an employee might be doing something illegal or against company policy, SpectorSoft has a huge suite of software you can use for both short-term and long-term investigations. The basic Spector CNE Investigator is designed for short-term investigations and comes with a host of tools:
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SpectorSoft also offers Spector 360 which includes advanced reports to analyze a user’s activity, global keyword search to find specific suspicious words or phrases among all platforms, and web filtering. The company says that Spector 360 is designed for more long-term investigations and monitoring, so most employers will probably be okay with CNE Investigator.
All SpectorSoft programs are paid apps, and you can only get a price by calling in for a quote. Naturally, this means it’s probably pretty expensive and this isn’t the kind of thing your average person will want. However, if you’re running one of those major studios that keeps leaking trailers, this might be something you’re interested in.
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Depending on your needs, you may need other monitoring software and there’s plenty more out there. These are our suggestions for a few common types of monitoring. Keep in mind, in virtually all cases, you’ll need physical access to the computer where you want to set any of this software up.
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We spent 120 hours testing monitoring software on desktop computers, laptops and mobile devices, downloading each monitoring program on several test computers, both in our on-site lab and on my personal devices at home.
This gave us a good idea of how each program works in real-life settings. We also installed programs on my children’s devices, then sat back and waited for the sounds of frustration as they attempted to access sites such as Facebook and Steam, that we purposely blocked. This let us see how well each software’s filters work.
Qustodio is easy to install on computers, tablets and cell phones. It has 29 filter categories and captures both sides of your child’s chat conversations.
As the children came upon popular sites that were blocked, we tested the programs’ whitelists and quick access features. Sometimes the kids sent a quick message through the monitoring program asking me to allow access to a specific website. We received this message through email or text alert and could then grant temporary or permanent access.
Most of the programs we tested let you block access to the web during specific times of the day, such as bedtime or when homework and chores need to get done. We tested all these time control features to make sure they worked properly.
Finally, we looked at the activity reports and evaluated how detailed they are. Some monitoring programs simply list the websites your child visited and the search terms they used. Others provide much more detail and include screenshots of the sites your kids visit, lists of blocked search terms entered, and both sides of chat conversations.
Based on our testing, we believe Qustodio is the best computer monitoring program because of its excellent safety tools, how easy it is to install and use on multiple devices, and the detailed reports it provides parents, including two-way transcripts of chat conversations.
Best Overall
Qustodio
Qustodio is easy to install on computers, tablets and cell phones. It has 29 filter categories and captures both sides of your child’s chat conversations.
Best for Cyberbullying
Surfie
Surfie alerts you when your child gets a message that contains tagged keywords, such as “don’t tell” or “you’re dumb,” so you can crack down on cyberbullying and online predators.
Best for Mac
ContentBarrier
ContentBarrier is specifically designed for Mac computers and laptops. It lets you block inappropriate websites and set time limits for when your child can be online.
Best OverallReasons to Buy
Has 18 filter categories
Comes with multiple licenses to monitor several devices at once
Reasons to Avoid
Isn’t compatible with Chromebook
$39.95
$54.95
$96.95
Qustodio has 29 filter categories, and when you choose one, the program blocks your kids from accessing any site with that type of content. Categories include pornography, violence, weapons, drugs and alcohol. It also has categories such as online shopping, gambling and games so you can keep your kids focused on more educational content.
If a site you’re fine with your kids visiting is blocked, you can add the URL to Qustodio’s whitelist, and the software unblocks it while still restricting access to other pages in the category. Likewise, if there is a site you want to block that doesn’t fall under a category, you can add it to the blacklist and Qustodio won’t let your kids access it.
On top of content blocking features, the program comes with time controls. These tools let you govern when your kids can be online so they can focus on getting chores or homework done and aren’t up late browsing the internet. You can also set exactly how much time they can be online in one sitting. If you install Qustodio on your child’s cell phone, you can use it to track where they are. You can also capture every text your child sends or receives and disable text ability completely from the Qustodio app. There is also a panic button – if your child finds themselves in a dangerous situation, such as if they get lost on the way home from school, they can hit the button and the program sends you a text message with their exact location so you can get to them quickly. Best for CyberbullyingComputer Monitor Software ComparedReasons to Buy
Has 18 filter categories
Comes with multiple licenses to monitor several devices at once
Reasons to Avoid
Isn’t compatible with Mac computers
Surfie lets you tag keywords and phrases, such as “don’t tell” and “home alone,” and if someone sends them to your child through email or instant message, the program notifies you through texts so you can stop the conversation quickly.
This feature can also be used in reverse, so you can block your child from sharing personal information such as their full name, birthdate or address.
The program has specific social media monitoring tools that show you what your child posts on both their own wall and their friends’ walls, as well as videos they watch and images they see. You can also monitor their friends’ social media accounts, and if they post anything inappropriate you don’t want your child to see, you can step in and block them. This also works with online gaming site chatrooms, where your child may be talking with complete strangers while playing. This monitoring program lets you completely block social media and online gaming sites so your kids can’t access them at all. It also allows you to disable instant messaging features on these types of sites – when you do, your kids can visit the webpages but can’t talk with anyone while there. When downloaded to your child’s cellphone, Surfie monitors and captures text messages between your child and their friends. Surfie has 18 filter categories, so you can instantly block sites about topics such as pornography, violence, suicide or drugs. You receive a text alert when your child attempts to visit any of these sites or if they search with keywords related to any blocked category. Best for MacReasons to Buy
Includes 23 filter categories
Reasons to Avoid
Doesn’t record chat conversations
Several monitoring programs are compatible with both Windows and Mac operating systems, but we’ve found that the Mac versions tend to be more difficult to set up and not as effective as the Windows versions. ContentBarrier, however, is specifically designed for Mac computers and laptops, so it is much more powerful and effective at monitoring your kids’ online activity.
ContentBarrier lets you block access to websites based on content by selecting categories such as gambling, sex, alcohol and racism. You can also block specific websites and search terms by adding them to the program’s blacklist.
With this Mac monitoring software, you can disable all chat features or choose to block your kids from typing or receiving messages with dangerous or revealing words or phrases such as “come alone,” “phone number” or “don’t tell.” If someone your child chats with uses one of these words or phrases, ContentBarrier automatically shuts down the chat program and doesn’t allow access until you, the parent, allow it. Best ValueReasons to BuyReasons to Avoid
$49.99
Norton Family isn’t the cheapest program available, but with the number of devices you can monitor at once, plus the multiple tools and over 45 internet filter categories, it is a great value for the price.
You can track everything your children do on five different devices, including mobile devices, and view screenshots of the websites, videos and images they are viewing. And if installed on a cellphone, Norton tells you when and who they are texting. Unfortunately, it doesn’t record these conversations, so you won’t know exactly what’s being sent back and forth unless the program happens to snap a screenshot while your child is texting. On top of monitoring your child’s online activity, Norton gives you time controls so you can block internet access all together during times when you kids should be asleep, in school, doing homework or participating in family activities.
Best for Cellphone MonitoringReasons to BuyReasons to Avoid
Mobicip can monitor all your kids’ activities regardless of the device they’re on. It’s compatible with both cellphones and tablets, including Kindles and Chromebooks.
The Basic version of Mobicip requires you to manually enter the URL of each website you want to block from your kids individually. However, the Premium version comes with 30 filter categories that let you quickly block every website that falls under that category. If your child needs to access a blocked site – for example to research a hot topic for school – you can temporarily unblock the site long enough for your child to gather the information they need.
The reports Mobicip gives you list the websites your child has visited and those they tried to visit but were blocked from accessing. But there isn’t much more information than that. Other programs track and provide transcripts of text and chat messages as well as snapping screenshots of what your child is looking at and monitoring the videos they watch online. Why Trust Us?
Top Ten Reviews has been testing monitoring software for 15 years, establishing ourselves as experts in the field. We stay on top of changes in the industry and keep an eye on the evolving threats online by subscribing to news outlets and online blogs that focus on internet security. We test, evaluate and review monitoring software several times a year, so we know the programs very well and understand how they work with new technologies.
Also, I am the mother of 10 children and grandmother to four. Keeping my children safe is my top priority, especially while they are online where so much information, both good and bad, is easily accessible. I use internet monitoring software at home, installing it on computers, laptops, cell phones and tablets. It creates opportunities to have good conversations with my kids about personal boundaries, cyberbullying and why restricting screen time is so important.
Am I Spying on My Children With Parental Controls?
There’s a difference between spying on your children and filtering the content they see. Nick Wingfield addresses these concerns in his New York Times article, Should You Spy on Your Kids? He mentions that parents who abuse and overuse this software will stifle the independence a child needs to develop into an adult. However, if your mindset is to keep your children safe and not about abusing power, you’ll be far from performing the role of Big Brother.
There are plenty of websites and apps out there that are dangerous and harmful to a growing mind. Protecting your children from these influences can be a good thing. If you notice that your child is searching for questionable content, it’s probably a good time to sit down and have a talk with them. They are growing and learning. The best way to process and understand their development is through open discussion.
How do I limit internet access at home?
Limiting the amount of time your child spends online is a good way to cut back on cyberbullying and encourage your child to engage in other activities like reading, sports and in-person interaction with friends and family members. It is also a good way to keep your child focused on homework, completing chores and getting enough sleep.
One way you can block your child’s internet access is through using an internet router filtering device, like Circle with Disney. This device connects to your router or modem and is directed to all the internet connected devices. It lets you turn off internet access to your child’s computers, cellphones, tablets, gaming consoles and other devices. However, these filters are not easy to set up, and some of them may require you to cut off access to all devices rather than just one.
Another way to limit online use is with a monitoring program like Qustodio. Qustodio includes time controls with its software that lets you set specific times your child can be online. And because you can create a different user account for each member of your family, each child and adult can have different time constraints without blocking others. These time controls also have timers so you can see how long your child is online each time they log on.
Use monitoring programs to combat cyberbullying and prevent teen suicideParent Computer Monitor Software
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), suicide is the third leading cause of death among children ages 10 through 14, and second for youth age 15 and older. While there are several factors that contribute to teen suicide, bullying in any form, including cyberbullying, is a large and growing contributing issue. Others include depression, exposure to pornography, drug addiction including prescription drug abuse, and extended periods on electronic devices.
We spoke to Lauran Warburton, a suicide prevention advocate and the founder of Live Hannah’s Hope, a non-profit organization that offers support and resources to help empower youth and support families left behind after suicide, and an advocate for the SafeUT app. Warburton, who lost her own daughter to suicide, offers several ways parents can help their children stay safe, connected and engaged, and some of the signs to look for that your child may be contemplating harming themselves. We at Top Ten Reviews encourage you to use these tips in addition to monitoring software as a way to keep tabs on your children, intervene when there is a problem and start healthy conversations with your children about self harm.
What to look for: Signs your child is thinking of self harm
Warburton shared with us that her daughter’s struggles began after an accident left her daughter with a concussion, which led to a change in mood, depression and isolating herself from friends. Other parents, especially those with children who play sports, sometimes see their children become addicted to prescription pain killers. As parents, you know your child best, and any major changes in their behavior may be a sign they are struggling. Additional signs include:
Grades slipping
Hanging out with different friends, or no friends at all
Saying things like “nobody likes me” or “I don’t have any friends”
Spending lots of time online rather than interacting with people face to face
Sudden or extreme mood changes
Depression (doesn’t want to do anything)
Anxiety (afraid of doing anything)
It is common for children, especially teenagers, to have struggles and moodiness, but Warburton said it becomes a problem when the child doesn’t bounce back after a setback. Still, it is a challenge for parents to differentiate when their child is depressed or just sad. “I think the parent that is in tune with their child, they will know,” says Warburton.
How parents can help
Though it is terrifying to think of your child in trouble, it is important for parents to show love and support rather than anger or disappointment. Warburton’s biggest advice to parents is “don’t get mad. [And] don’t be ashamed to talk about” what’s going on with your child. Suicide, depression, bullying – these are all hard topics to talk about, but children feel better when they can share their feelings with their parents.
If you think your child is seriously thinking of hurting themselves, it is important to not dismiss your feelings and seek help from professionals who will provide guidance, support and resources to help you and your child.
More information on signs to look for and resources, including references for professionals available in your area, can be found on the National Suicide Prevention website, or by calling the National Suicide Prevention hotline: 1-800-273-8255.
How much does monitoring software cost?
While there are free programs, the best monitoring software comes with better protection, including multiple filter categories, text and chat transcripts and screenshot reports. You can expect to pay around $50 for a good, secure program that also includes between three and five licenses to monitor multiple devices.
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